Different Mes

hmm.. another farewell today! haha sometimes i think i've resigned to the fact that this is probably going to be happening for the rest of my life - seeing people leave for the different nations they've come from or going to another nation that God has called them to.

Interestingly, I've always felt called to the nations, but it seems like God is bringing the nations to where i am. Part of me thinks its really cool, but part of me also like.. i wanna go too, God! but i know God knows what's best. and looking back, He's really been preparing me for a season like this, where farewells are bittersweet, but now more sweet than bitter unlike before. I think its also me taking the perspective of who I have left here with me than just longing for the one that's left.. and i realised truly how much God has blessed me.

Sometimes i sit and wonder, that surely i have done nothing to deserve the wonderful pp around me.. my friends, my family.. they are so amazing! and it's true, i've done nothing deserving.. sometimes i wonder why they remain my friends as 'unfriendly' as i may be at times.. and i still wonder. I just realised that with each year and with each farewell, it is almost like GOD showing how He has expanded my friendships not just in numbers but over the world and continents and i m so grateful. How did a heartlander like me end up.. where i am today? God is the God of the nations, and if we only let Him move in our lives, what a great work He can do.

I guess today i am just really filled with a sense of gratefulness of the people GOD has brought in my life.. i don't know why they like me as a friend even and i don't know why they. stick by me (mabbe they have no choice also lah..haha).

Just on the MRT today also chatting w some friends that i've made in recent years.. I realised that different pp that i've met in different stages of my life all see a different side of me. Nobody would believe that i was a crazy clown before, n nobody would believe that i was once was so shy n fearful and hated confrontation. At uni level.. pp saw the guillible, hardworking super diligent side of me, at work, pp saw the quiet hardworking, easygoing but serious side of me. Then later on, my D side and my outspoken side came out. Sometimes i think my old friends stick by me because they remember the Ivy that i once was, and they hope for the best..hehe. Thank u all, all the same for still seeing me as a friend

My family! Why did they let me get away with being spoilt when i was a kid huh? hahah.. i dont know why they treat me like they do.. i feel like a princess, even now :p but in a more grounded sort of a way and i m grateful.


I don't know how come i'm so blessed to have people like this around me! i am so
undeserving but yet so loved ( or rather, i feel it).. i guess that's what Amazing Grace is
about.

I am just reminding myself with this verse that has stuck with me since i first read it: "To act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with my God" - Micah 6:8 all the rest of my days. Teach me to walk humbly with you, God.. in all that I do.